Dear Failure,
If you're all going to die, what's the point of even trying to live?
Death
Dear Death,
I received your question and I thought "huh, good point" and then I went and rewatched Ingmar Bergman's The Seventh Seal, in which you star! To jog your memory (I have no idea how you keep track of the breadth of your work), you starred in this sick Swedish film in the 50s by one of my very favorite directors. I first saw you in this film when I was in high school and I was like "whoa, cool habit," because I thought you kind of looked like a sickly nun and I really wanted to be a nun when I was a kid after seeing Sister Act. Anyways, listen, the Black Plague is like *ravaging* Sweden, so you are hella busy, and then this cute ass knight shows up because you're like "Hi, I'm Death and I'm about to snatch your ass," and this knight is like, "I'm a cute ass knight. What if we play chess instead and if I win, then I get to live?" Lol. It’s intense.
There's a whole thing happening with the Book of Revelation throughout the film and the cute ass knight is essentially like, "God, where art thou?" the whole movie, and his squire is like, "Dude, God is dead." It's actually a lot funnier than I remembered. My favorite part is when you pretend to be a priest and the knight is confessing to you and thinks God is real and that you're like a vessel for God or whatever and then you turn your head ever so slightly and the knight is like, "Omg! DEATH! You tricked me!" and you're like "Lol, duh. I'm Death."
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